Restriction is the correct way of living, until its not.
When we just start making sense of world, by then, we are already conditioned with a long list of protocols. To make a small person, civilized, I am definitely not against that idea. Teach them how to be better, but don't just shut every idea in their mind. Don't tell them that their sole purpose of existence is to make their creators not ashamed of them. Too harsh! Sorry, I know I need to dial it down.
I cannot count the number of times when I said that I don't want to do something and I was told that mind is a misguided reckless horse and you need to reign it at all times and never let it be free.
- You want to do something in school, restrict and don't indulge in mischief, because that's what bad kids do.
- You want to be creative at home, restrict because you don't want to be messy kid who needs to be set right.
- You want something, restrict yourself from asking for it, because you don't want to be those bad mannered kids who throw themselves on the shop floor and cry their lungs out. They are a shame to their parents.
- You want something which kids your age are bringing, restrict because you should be grateful for having things you already have, as your parent didn't even have those.
- You want some cosmetic, like nail color or lip color, restrict because that's what fashionista girls do, not the studious good girls. Not to mention the culture part.
- You are falling in love with someone, restrict and fall in love with opposite sex only and while you are at it check if all the caste religion mandates are in place. And it would be so much better if you restrict yourself from thinking about love, etc, because your parents will find someone for you when they think you are good to go.
- You want to be tired and not do something, you cannot, because you don't want to be loser.
- You want to step out of the house for a while, make sure you wear something that is displayable but don't be modern. Stick to cultural roots.
- You want to learn to cook, you shouldn't because that is a skill for skill less.
- You resort to eating outside food, then restrict and arrange for healthy home made food, because there is nothing like it.
- You are eating too much, you are eating too less.
- You want a dress, then you should first get that body, so restrict yourself and get into "desirable" shape.
- Now you are marriageable age, restrict from dreaming too much, switch on the soap opera mode, be happy about marriage and new life. Yay, exciting!
Restrict and live a happy, pre defined, calculated life, because that's the only way to do it, no wait, correct way to do it. Restriction is good, discipline is good, the kid who breathes as per parents permission is good. Wow there are only so little ways to be in the good category, and so many people. And that is the only category you need to be longing for, struggling to be in, or you might as well be in junkyard. Every aspect of life should be very calculated, pre-defined and restricted within acceptable bounds. Because you know, be happy, don't "restrict too much", because your parents are struggling day and night to provide. The least they can expect is a happy kid, according to their convenience.
Restriction is good, until it becomes a mental disorder and the person feels remorse for doing something they want, as menial as listening to a song which they like. Restriction is glamourized, hence the diet culture, so insidiously weaved in the system. The remains of the person are incapable of making any choice. A person who fails to look inside. A person who cannot breathe without validation from others. A person who sits on the pedestal at all times, and will break but cannot come down. They say that child artists have it difficult, I say a lot of us do, but our suffering isn't documented and released in million dollar movies. But thank you to those, who chose to speak about it, I really thank them because as the world goes they gave us the voice. The icons, the artists, made us feel that it is not ok to keep living like this, there are invisible chains, we cannot see them, but they are hurting more than just physically. Thank you, to all the people for stripping vulnerable in front of gazillion people, they shared their stories otherwise who is going to read this. No one would have known.
